What kind of man won’t pay to play?


The internet is filled with pornography.  Millions of men consume it freely and widely every single day.  Plenty of men also sign up to subscription sites to pay for premium content, not finding what they are looking for amongst the free stuff.

At the same time, on social media platforms, you name them, there is also a large community of people who look for titillation through interaction.  As an observer on the fringes of the online D/s scene, I see this on almost every platform.  What I also see is frequent laments amongst the SW community about men who want to interact for free, or who refuse to pay.

In my own profile, while not to the same degree, I am approach several times every day for kinky play.  People who want to sext with me, or get me to send them dirty pictures.  What I don’t understand is why so many of these people react to the concept of paying as if that is far worse than what they are doing online in the first place.

“I never pay,” comes back with such force as if it is part of male identity, male prowess.  It certainly speaks of privilege.  But the ladies online on these various platforms go to extraordinary efforts to produce content that will excite and titillate, and they should be paid for it.  The vast majority are working independently, outside of the porn industry, which is predominantly male-controlled and still often very exploitative.  So why the problem paying?

Not least because said man almost certainly has bought dirty magazines in the past, most probably has subscribed to some kind of online dirty movie or film clip service.  I’m just saying, because the numbers are staggering.  So why not pay to sext?  Why not pay for custom content?  I know plenty of men do, and well they should.

It isn’t that hard to understand that those people who are creating content are spending their time doing that instead of something else, and time is money.  They are spending their time interacting with you instead of doing something that might be more lucrative and productive for them.  It can’t be too hard for a man as a consumer to understand that a porn magazine is cheap because it is not bespoke and is mass-produced, so too the subscription services…but when you get into live interactions, whether on the phone, video, sexting, or however, it is of increasing value-add, and that carries a price.  A man who approaches and thinks a woman (or me) should interact with him so that both can get off in a mutually rewarding relation is beyond deluded. Their delusion is an act of violence against the woman receiving the overture.

A man asked me to send nude pictures of myself to him, that he was generous and would take care of me.  I asked him to send me money first.  “I don’t pay for this.  Why would I do that?”  What does he think generous means?  Many of these men are fat, lonely, unattractive, and yet they still don’t have the sense to reach out with an open wallet before asking to engage their kink.  Male entitlement never ceases to amaze. What gives?  You want validation?  Pay for it.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s